What football fan doesn’t look forward to their club’s kit announcement full of hope that maybe this year it’ll actually be something they’ll want to wear? There’s nothing worse than seeing your team have decided that they’re going to man it up with a pink away kit. Or how about United going shades of grey?
Every club, from the premier league giants to the one season wonders, has committed a shirt design sin of some form. Whether it’s newly promoted teams trying to leave a lasting impression during their short stay or so called ‘designers’ vomiting forth designs so bad you wouldn’t want to wipe up your spilled beer with it.
But to be honest, we kind of love these kit catastrophies. It’s comforting to see the world’s highest paid sports stars trotting out in a shirt so bad that even Chris Kamara wouldn’t wear it. So to celebrate the very best and the worst here’s our look at…
and the What the fugly?!?
10. Norwich City Third 2015-16
Proving that kit designers are still being given way too much creative control over their work is this blinding Norwich third kit. It looks more like a fast food uniform than the shirt that marked the Canaries triumphant return to Premier League football.
9. Chelsea Away 1996-98
There’s nothing wrong with yellow and blue, but the shades used on Chelsea’s 96-98 jersey looked like a mix of a combination of cleaning products and bodily fluids that’s been left to stew in a dark corner somewhere sad.
8. Fulham Third 2013-14
Fulham left a very bitter taste with the Premier League after being relegated to the Football League Championship. It wasn’t that they had caused any controversies or been responsible for any league upsets… it was their toxic looking blue third kit, complete with that radioactive orange hue. And so ended 13 years of Premier League status.
7. Tottenham Third 2006-07
Chocolate and gold is a real throwback to the glory days of repulsive 70s interior design. It’s a colour combo that belongs on a worn and faded sofa at your grandma’s house, not on a football pitch. Never on a football pitch.
6. Nottingham Forest Away 1995-97
Effectively answering the age old question of what happens when you let a toddler scribble on a perfectly decent jersey is the 95-97 Nottingham Forest away shirt. We’re guessing the designer was playing with potato prints that day.
5. Arsenal Away 1991-93
They might have had one of the greatest defences in league history, but they were wearing what is now universally known as the ‘bruised banana’ shirt. This clanger wouldn’t look out of place in a plastic lunchbox, sat next to a Fruit Shoot and a Wagon Wheel.
4. Aston Villa Away 1993-95
Kit sponsors are an awkward consideration for kit manufacturers, but when a yoghurt company with a painfully garish logo offers to sponsor you… say no. It doesn’t help that the logo is emblazoned on a queasy arrangement of vomit green, oily blue and blood red stripes.
3. Liverpool Third 2013-14
Liverpool really slipped up when it came to their third kit of the 13/14 season. In fact this fashion faux pas rivals their all white FA Cup final suits that ‘The Spice Boys’ famously wore. Purple, white and black with some faded rhombus pattern is the stuff of nightmares.
2. Manchester United Away 1992-93
There’s a reason why kits come with the club crest stitched on them and this early 90s monstrosity is that reason. Supposedly produced to guarantee that absolutely nobody whatsoever could be confused about which team was Manchester United, this baffling blue and black ensemble features a massive black print of the club crest… with the actual club crest stitch on top of it.
1. Chelsea Away 1994-96
It’s rarely successful when clubs introduce two random colours into one of their new kits, and when those colours are orange and grey it’s hard to see how this ever made it into production. Throw in some bright orange shorts and socks and you get what happens when someone tries and fails to liven up their wardrobe.
Have your say…
If you think we’ve missed a terrible football kit that you think needs mocking then let us know your thoughts and we’ll get those vomit inducing howlers included in the above list.
*Images copyright of ClassicFootballShirts.co.uk